Back-to-School Rhythms: Finding Your Flow in Changing Routines
By Dr. Hayley Chrzastowski, OTD, OTR/L, CEIM
As a maternal/infant occupational therapist and pelvic floor therapist but first year as a mom I am really starting to feel the shift of “returning to school”. Josie is not yet in daycare or school yet but I hear it from other moms and I now feel it for myself - that shift that occurs with this season. It is physical, mental, and emotional. Even if your baby or toddler isn’t in school yet, you likely feel it in the air—earlier mornings, tighter schedules, and an overall rush of energy that can feel both exciting and overwhelming. The new routine brings consistency and predictability and yet it can also bring unknown, evening chaos, and school drama. For families with school-age children, it’s a full-on transition. And for moms juggling infants, toddlers, school drop-offs, lunch packing, and that elusive moment of self-care... well, it’s a lot.
Here’s the thing: transitions are hard. For kids. For grownups. For our nervous systems. Even when it’s a transition we’re looking forward to.
The Emotional Load of Transition
Let’s name it: the beginning of the school year often brings more than just new backpacks and lunchboxes. It can bring:
Changes in sleep schedules (hello, 6:30am wake-ups 😴)
Separation anxiety—for little ones and their parents
Re-entry into structure, which may be met with resistance or fatigue
Shifts in family dynamics, especially if a sibling is home while another is off to school
A fresh wave of mental load for moms who manage calendars, forms, activities, and emotions
If you’re feeling a little (or a lot) thrown off right now, you’re not alone.
From Chaos to Rhythm: Finding Your Flow
There’s no perfect formula for adjusting to a new routine—but as an OT, I lean on rhythm, not rigidity.
Here are a few things that can help ease the transition:
🕰️ 1. Start with one anchor point.
If your day feels disorganized, find one predictable anchor—maybe it’s morning breakfast together or an evening wind-down routine. Predictability helps both children and adults feel safer in times of change. It can provide your children with a safe space and time that they know they have your attention.
🧠 2. Expect a 3-week adjustment period.
Occupational therapists often talk about the "3-week rule”—it usually takes at least 2-3 weeks for a new routine to start feeling like a habit. So if it’s rocky right now? That’s normal. Give it time and space to settle. Don’t over-extend yourself during this time. Be patient with the process and allow yourself to settle into your new groove as the dust from the 3 weeks has settled.
🧸 3. Support the sensory system.
Transitions can overload the senses - for everyone in the family. Especially for moms who are often balancing the schedules, baths, outfits, lunches, and work. Try to build in sensory regulation breaks throughout the day—time to move, swing, cuddle, rock, go outside, or be quiet. This helps children (and you) stay more regulated and better able to handle change.
🫶 4. Make space for big feelings.
Change often brings tears, tantrums, or clinginess. This isn’t a sign that something’s wrong—it’s your child’s way of processing their world. Children look to us to model how to handle change, emotions, and unknown - your calm presence helps them co-regulate. You don’t need perfect words. Just being there matters most.
🧘♀️ 5. Don’t forget yourself.
You’re also transitioning. Whether you're returning to work, adjusting nap schedules, or just navigating the mental gymnastics of parenting multiple kids—your nervous system needs care too.
Hydrate.
Stretch.
Breathe.
Rest (even if it’s 5 minutes in your parked car).
And remember: You don’t have to do it all, all at once.
A Word on the Pelvic Floor
I’d be remiss if I didn’t remind you that stress, fatigue, and constant “go mode” can show up physically—in your pelvic floor, in your digestion, in your breath.
A dysregulated nervous system often leads to tension in the core and pelvic floor. So if you’re feeling more symptoms (leaking, tightness, pain, etc.) during this season, your body may be asking for rest and reconnection.
Try this simple reconnection breath:
🧘♀️ Inhale gently through your nose and let your belly soften.
🌬️ Exhale slowly and feel your body melt downward.
Do this for 3 breaths—just 3—and notice what shifts.
And, as always, if this isn’t working for you - reach out. Let’s work together to get you back on track!
You’re Not Doing It Wrong
If this season feels messy, emotional, exhausting, or chaotic… you are not doing it wrong. It’s just a transition. And like all transitions, it won’t last forever. Just like my first tattoo on my rib cage says - “This too shall pass”.
Give yourself (and your children) more grace, more time, and more compassion than you think you need. You don’t have to be the perfect mom—you just have to be present, and human.
You’ve got this. One deep breath at a time.
With you in this season,
Dr. Hayley, OT & Mama